Coaching the Kids Nobody Else Wanted

We've included kids who didn't get to play much at other clubs and kids who no other club would take.

Introduction

“We’ve included kids who didn’t get to play much at other clubs and kids who no other club would take.”

This sentence from a coach in our community represents grassroots football at its best.

The Reality of Exclusion

Not every kid fits the mould:

  • The one who struggles with attention
  • The one who’s physically behind
  • The one with challenging behaviour
  • The one who learns differently

Many clubs quietly push these players out. “Not the right fit.” “Maybe try another team.”

These kids end up without football. Without the benefits it brings.

Why Inclusion Matters

For the Individual

Football provides:

  • Physical activity
  • Social connection
  • Sense of belonging
  • Achievement experiences
  • Adult mentorship

Every child deserves access to these benefits. Not just the talented or easy ones.

For the Team

Inclusive teams develop:

  • Empathy
  • Patience
  • Leadership
  • Diverse perspectives

Players learn that value isn’t defined by ability alone.

For the Coach

Coaching challenging players develops your skills faster than coaching easy ones. You learn:

  • Differentiation
  • Communication adaptation
  • Behaviour management
  • Creative problem-solving

The players that stretch you most, teach you most.

Practical Inclusion Strategies

Understand Before Expecting

Before demanding behaviour changes, understand what’s driving the behaviour.

Talk to parents. Learn about the child. Adjust expectations based on their reality, not your ideal.

Modify Activities, Not Participation

Instead of excluding during activities, modify:

  • Smaller groups for overwhelmed players
  • Clear, simple instructions for processing differences
  • Visual demonstrations alongside verbal explanations
  • Movement breaks for high-energy players

Create Roles That Fit

Not everyone thrives in 11v11. Find contributions that suit:

  • Warm-up leader
  • Equipment helper
  • Younger player mentor
  • Team encourager

Everyone can contribute something.

Partner Strategically

Pair challenging players with patient, supportive teammates. Brief the partner privately. Create conditions for success.

Celebrate Effort and Progress

For players who struggle, traditional measures of success may be inaccessible. Celebrate:

  • Attendance consistency
  • Effort in sessions
  • Small improvements
  • Positive interactions

Make success achievable for everyone.

The Coach’s Mindset

They’re Not Problems to Manage

They’re players to develop. Like everyone else.

Low Expectations Become Self-Fulfilling

Expect them to grow. Expect improvement. Believe in their potential.

It’s Not About You

Their behaviour rarely is personal. Don’t take it personally.

Progress Looks Different

The player who starts unable to pass and ends able to? That’s as much development as the talented player refining technique.

When It Works

“Still going, starting at U7 and now U16 with a happy bunch of currently 18 kids.”

18 kids. U7 to U16. Including those nobody else would take.

That’s legacy.

Conclusion

Some coaches chase talent. Others develop whoever shows up.

Both have value. But the coach who takes the kids nobody else wanted? They change lives in ways trophy-winning coaches never will.

Every kid deserves a coach who sees them.

Be that coach.