Introduction
“There’s no longevity if you’re not good at the people part.”
This observation from a coach in our community cuts to the heart of sustainable coaching.
Technical Knowledge Isn’t Enough
You can understand tactics perfectly. You can design brilliant sessions. You can analyse the game with precision.
None of it matters if:
- Players don’t trust you
- Parents don’t support you
- Volunteers don’t stay
- The committee doesn’t back you
Football is a people business disguised as a sport.
The People Skills That Matter
With Players
Trust Building
- Following through on promises
- Consistent treatment
- Genuine interest in their lives beyond football
- Honest feedback delivered with care
Communication Adaptation
- Reading when players need encouragement vs challenge
- Adjusting language for different personalities
- Knowing when to speak and when to listen
- Making complex ideas accessible
With Parents
Expectation Management
- Clear communication upfront
- Consistent messaging
- Transparent decision-making
- Appropriate boundaries
Conflict Navigation
- Calm responses under pressure
- Seeking understanding before defending
- Finding common ground
- Knowing when to escalate and when to resolve
With Other Volunteers
Appreciation
- Regular thanks
- Public recognition
- Understanding their constraints
- Valuing their contribution
Collaboration
- Sharing decision-making
- Incorporating their ideas
- Supporting their development
- Building a team, not a hierarchy
Why Coaches Fail at People
They Prioritise Content Over Connection
Spending hours on session planning, minutes on relationship building.
They Avoid Difficult Conversations
Letting small issues become big problems.
They Assume Understanding
Expecting people to know what they’re thinking without communication.
They Take It Personally
Responding to challenges as attacks rather than problems to solve.
Developing People Skills
Intentional Practice
Like any skill, people skills improve with deliberate effort:
- Practice difficult conversations before they happen
- Reflect on interactions that went well and badly
- Seek feedback on your communication
- Read about leadership and relationships
Community Connection
“Have connected with a couple within this group as well as several on Twitter. All of this has made me a better coach.”
Other coaches can share approaches. Learn from their people experiences.
Self-Awareness
Know your tendencies:
- Do you avoid conflict or create it?
- Do you listen or wait to speak?
- Do you assume or verify?
- Do you appreciate or expect?
Awareness precedes change.
The Long Game
Technical knowledge has a ceiling. Tactics evolve but stabilise.
People skills compound forever. The better you get with people, the more effective every other skill becomes.
Longevity Evidence
The coaches who stay decades in the game? They’re not always the most tactically sophisticated.
They’re the ones players remember fondly. The ones parents thank. The ones volunteers return for.
Conclusion
“There’s no longevity if you’re not good at the people part.”
Master the Xs and Os. But invest equally in the human element.
That’s where sustainable coaching lives.