Introduction
“It’s worth it for the 1-2-1 alone.”
“Really enjoyed our chat, could have chatted for another hour.”
In a world of courses, videos, and content libraries, sometimes the most valuable thing is a conversation.
Why 1-2-1 Conversations Matter
Personalised Guidance
Content speaks to everyone. Conversation speaks to you.
Your specific context, your specific challenges, your specific team - addressed directly.
Real-Time Processing
You think through problems as you talk. The act of articulating clarifies.
A good conversation partner helps you see what you’re actually dealing with.
Immediate Feedback
No waiting to submit and receive response. Ideas are tested immediately.
“What about this?” “Have you considered that?” “What would happen if…”
Emotional Support
Content doesn’t know when you’re struggling. Conversation does.
Sometimes you need someone to say “that sounds really hard” before you can hear advice.
What Good Coaching Conversations Include
Active Listening
Not just waiting to give advice. Genuinely understanding your situation.
Questioning Over Telling
The best mentors ask questions that help you find answers, not just provide their answers.
Challenge With Care
“Have you considered…” “What would happen if…” “Why do you think that is?”
Gentle challenges that push thinking without creating defensiveness.
Practical Application
Conversation should lead somewhere. What will you do differently?
Encouragement
Recognition of what’s working. Reminder that challenges are normal.
Finding Good Conversation Partners
Experienced Coaches
Those who’ve been where you are. Who know the challenges from inside.
Peer Coaches
Those at similar stages. Who are processing similar challenges.
External Perspectives
Those from different contexts. Who bring fresh angles.
Formal Mentorship
Structured relationships with dedicated development focus.
Community Connections
“Have connected with a couple within this group as well as several on Twitter. All of this has made me a better coach.”
Multiple conversation partners serve different purposes.
Making Conversations Valuable
Come Prepared
Know what you want to discuss. Specific questions get specific answers.
Be Open
Don’t defend current approach. Be willing to hear alternatives.
Take Notes
Capture insights. You’ll forget otherwise.
Follow Up
Report back on what you tried. Continue the conversation over time.
Give As Well As Take
The best coaching relationships are reciprocal. Share your insights too.
When to Seek Conversations
Stuck Points
When you don’t know what to try next.
Decision Points
When you’re choosing between options.
Validation Needs
When you want to check if you’re on the right track.
Processing Needs
When you need to think through something complex.
Celebration
When things go well and you want to share.
The Compound Effect
Regular conversations compound:
- Relationship deepens
- Context understanding grows
- Advice becomes more relevant
- Support becomes more natural
Long-term mentoring relationships are worth investing in.
Conclusion
“Could have chatted for another hour.”
That’s the sign of a valuable conversation. Time disappears. Insights multiply.
Find people worth talking to. Make time for those conversations. They might be the highest-value development you can access.