Introduction
“Wish I would’ve had this from the very beginning.”
Every experienced coach has this thought. What would have changed if you’d known earlier?
Here’s accumulated wisdom from coaches who’ve walked the path.
On Development Over Results
What We Wish We’d Known
“Wins at U10 don’t matter. Development does.”
Early focus on winning creates:
- Player selection over development
- Short-term tactics over long-term growth
- Pressure over enjoyment
- Narrow success definition
What We Know Now
Development-focused coaching:
- Builds better players long-term
- Creates better environments
- Produces more enjoyment
- Often leads to results anyway
The irony: development focus often creates more wins than winning focus.
On Session Design
What We Wish We’d Known
“Drills aren’t sessions. Games teach football.”
Early approach:
- Line drills
- Isolated techniques
- No game connection
- Bored players
What We Know Now
Game-based approach:
- Players in game situations
- Decisions required
- Transfer to matches
- Engaged learners
Activities should look like football.
On Communication
What We Wish We’d Known
“Less talking. More playing.”
Early mistake:
- Over-explaining
- Long stoppages
- Lecture-style coaching
- Words over actions
What We Know Now
Effective communication:
- Brief and clear
- Visual demonstrations
- Questions over instructions
- Let the game teach
“Show me” beats “Let me explain.”
On Relationships
What We Wish We’d Known
“Know your players as people first.”
Early focus:
- Players as performers
- Results as relationship
- Correction over connection
- Role over human
What We Know Now
Relationship-first coaching:
- Names remembered
- Lives understood
- Connection before correction
- Person over player
Players perform for coaches they feel known by.
On Parents
What We Wish We’d Known
“Most parents want to help. They just don’t know how.”
Early assumption:
- Parents are problems
- Keep them away
- Defensive posture
- Us versus them
What We Know Now
Parent partnerships:
- Clear communication
- Defined expectations
- Involvement opportunities
- Assumed good intent
Most parent problems come from unclear expectations.
On Mistakes
What We Wish We’d Known
“Your mistakes won’t break them.”
Early fear:
- Perfect session required
- Errors catastrophic
- Player fragility assumed
- Paralysing pressure
What We Know Now
Healthy perspective:
- Players are resilient
- Mistakes are learning
- Perfection impossible
- Good enough is good
One bad session doesn’t damage development.
On Learning
What We Wish We’d Known
“Badges are beginning, not end.”
Early belief:
- Qualification equals competence
- Course completion means readiness
- Badge level defines ability
- Formal learning is learning
What We Know Now
Continuous development:
- Badges open doors
- Real learning never stops
- Multiple learning sources
- Application beats acquisition
The best coaches never stop learning.
On Community
What We Wish We’d Known
“You can’t develop alone.”
Early approach:
- Solo coaching
- Figure it out yourself
- Ask for help is weakness
- Isolation
What We Know Now
Community value:
- Shared learning
- Collective wisdom
- Support systems
- Accelerated development
“Without this community I wouldn’t have become the coach I am today.”
On Yourself
What We Wish We’d Known
“Your wellbeing matters for your players.”
Early sacrifice:
- Burnout approaching
- Family neglected
- Health ignored
- Unsustainable pace
What We Know Now
Sustainable coaching:
- Rest is productive
- Family comes first
- Health enables service
- Longevity over intensity
Burned out coaches help nobody.
On Time
What We Wish We’d Known
“Player development isn’t linear. Be patient.”
Early expectation:
- Steady improvement
- Quick results
- Linear progression
- Impatient frustration
What We Know Now
Development reality:
- Plateaus normal
- Breakthroughs unpredictable
- Time required
- Patience rewarded
Development is a years project, not weeks.
On Enjoyment
What We Wish We’d Known
“If you’re not enjoying it, something’s wrong.”
Early experience:
- Stress dominated
- Burden not joy
- Obligation not passion
- Surviving not thriving
What We Know Now
Coaching should be:
- Fulfilling most days
- Energising often
- Worth the investment
- Sustainable long-term
If you hate it, fix it or leave it.
Applying This Wisdom
For New Coaches
You don’t have to learn everything the hard way.
Read these lessons. Trust them. Apply them early.
For Experienced Coaches
Share what you’ve learned.
Help newer coaches skip the painful lessons.
For Everyone
“Wish I would’ve had this from the very beginning.”
Maybe you didn’t. But coaches coming behind you can.
Conclusion
Every coach accumulates lessons through experience.
The privilege of community is shortcutting that process.
“Wish I would’ve had this from the very beginning.”
You have it now. Use it. Share it. Build on it.